Thursday, March 20, 2008

Some Days Are Like That…

LJ is having one of THOSE days. I often envy the Nike and the cats. After all, what have they got to do? They sleep when they want, food gets served up twice a day on schedule, and as far as I know they don’t lay awake worrying about anything.

But today, LJ is having one of THOSE days. First, it wasn’t his fault that he was on the kitchen counter this morning at precisely 5:40 a.m. I’m sure he had a perfectly legitimate reason for being there. Clearly there was some sort of important cat business to be attended to. However, LJ failed to consider one important detail in his counter-surfing plan. At 5:40 a.m. my coffee pot roars to life. And it doesn’t just start to politely stream hot water through the filter. My coffee pot, a Christmas gift from Rob, has a built-in coffee bean grinder. Its first task is to pulverize the beans into fine powder.

Imagine for a moment that you’re a cat in the midst of a stealthy prowl in forbidden territory. I’m sure LJ was quite pleased with himself for pulling off a successful counter reconnoissance. Then, out of the darkness behind you, the horrific sound of a cat-eating monster, intent on chewing you up with whirling steel teeth.

I’m also sure that LJ didn’t intentionally knock over the bottle of olive oil. I’m sure that in the frantic moments when Lives # 1 through 8 were flashing before his eyes he just didn’t see the olive oil or the salt shaker or the pepper grinder. Nope, I’m sure he just started running and didn’t stop until he arrived safely under our bed.

I missed all this – I got out of the shower and went to get my coffee per normal. Fortunately for me, the kitchen chaos woke Rob, and he got the joy of clearing up after LJs attempt to imitate Rachael Ray.

One of the great things about the forced kitchen remodel is that we have a new fridge. It’s beautiful, stainless steel, side by side doors, and water and ice dispenser in the freezer door. We didn’t have any of that before. The new fridge arrived on Tuesday, and last night Rob plumbed the water and ice. In a previous life, I had one of these refrigerators, and a dog that learned how to dispense her own ice. The ice machine was her friend. Nike loves ice too, but hasn’t learned to get it himself. Nowadays, refrigerators come with a locking setting for the very purpose of stopping dogs and two-year olds from turning your kitchen floor into the North Atlantic in April.

So while I was getting my coffee, the cats ventured out looking for the aforementioned regularly scheduled breakfast. Unfortunately for LJ, he chose to wait in front of the refrigerator. And at that particular moment, a horrible grinding noise, another cat-eating monster, intent on chewing him up with whirling steel teeth. Because overnight the ice machine froze up its water store and so now it’s doing its thing – making ice. And dropping the cubes into an empty plastic storage tub in the freezer. LJ remembered he’d already used up a life this morning and high-tailed it for the bedroom again.

He may still be in there. I don’t know. He’s having one of THOSE days. I’m glad I’m not a cat. Besides, their food is nasty. I’m going to Starbucks and getting a scone.

Find amazing and amusing in your day!

J

3 comments:

Beth said...

Good one this morning - you, however, owe me a new keyboard.

kclynn89 said...

Reminds me of the time my sister's dog was "cleaning" the dishes in the dishwasher before the dishwasher did the cleaning and he got the silverware holder stuck on his collar and when all was said and done - he was hiding in the back bedroom with a steak knife stuck in his flank. Just think if you had a video camera in your kitchen, you could have won $10K on America's Funniest Video.

Patience-please said...

Priceless! Thanks for the chuckles!

all the best-
Patience

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